?

Log in

Kimberly [userpic]

This is my big girl day.

May 25th, 2008 (01:34 pm)

I got home from the shore about an hour ago. Holes, shit broken. Apparently my strict, Catholic and usually pristine parents had a fight. My dad's not here. The only information I can get from my mom: "He wants me to have nothing." So they were getting a divorce. Their kids didn't know. Hmm. "I'm getting half of everything that's mine." So of course instead of talking it gets turned around on how I ruined my sister's tank top accidentally. Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Interesting.
This is my big girl day. I'm not upset at all, this all should have happened a few fights ago. It is, however, monumental, and just cements what I already knew about marriage and love and that it can't exist together. So happily, I'm getting ready for work, to save more money. I will never be like my mom and let a man support me, even if he is my husband. Stupid stupid stupid.

Kimberly [userpic]

Thoughts on 4 hours of sleep.

May 1st, 2008 (09:34 am)

For the past month Tim and I have been in imminent danger of breaking up and it finally happened last night. I'm sort of relieved and definitely sad. I'm still trying to tell if we could work things out, I'd really like them to. I'm so tired though. I don't understand why people who have their feelings hurt repeatedly are expected to become numb to it after a period of time or how it's even possible to do that. It hurts the same every time, unless a deeper understanding of the other person is somehow extracted from the situation. If someone doesn't want to learn to treat you right, then don't be with them. If they wanted to be with you, they'd act more respectfully. And this I have to keep in mind for the future.

Kimberly [userpic]

In love

April 28th, 2008 (12:42 am)

I'm in love with "Hello, Dear Wind" by Page France. I want a happy ending.

Kimberly [userpic]

Update.

April 8th, 2008 (11:44 pm)

Hey world, how are you? I've been around, working a lot, trying to keep my grades up (doing okay.) I am a pretty boring person. Old Jewish women love me, I love them too. I'm refusing to vote, I haven't really explained myself to anyone, but I'm not voting, it won't matter. What's going on in politics has nothing to do with reality. I believe in the American spirit. Going to start making the airsoft documentary soon, hopefully! I'm trying my best to get all that together. I am very tired of being sick. Seven months on Friday :).

Kimberly [userpic]

(no subject)

March 22nd, 2008 (12:28 am)

Mer Tim's in Las Vegas.

Kimberly [userpic]

The Mystique of Craigslist

March 6th, 2008 (09:44 pm)
silly

current mood: silly

I'm producing and directing a short film. Charged with the task of casting, I skeptically posted my add on Craigslist late Sunday night. By eight am Monday morning, my inbox contained six replies. It's Thursday and they keep coming.
So what is it about my Craigslist add that attracted every animated life form from here to Egg Harbor, NJ? Was it the "no pay?" The free meal and soda I offered? (PB & J.) I know not everyone gets the opportunity to act in a four minute student film, that a free copy of the finished project along with your resume will get you a supporting role in the newest Woody Allen movie along-side Larry David.
I guess I'm just wondering how anyone can be so excited about a student film. I kinda hate making narrative cinema. I hate working in a group. I hate omni lights and c-stands. So I guess what I'm trying to say is props, Craigslist, for making my life a little easier and making me feel like what I'm doing is really important.

PS. Dear 15yr old Nina,
A four minute student film isn't worth a Greyhound Bus trip from the Jersey shore. I know you have "the acting bug" but a student film isn't going to get you further than University City, Philadelphia and even though you have no experience and your teacher says you have great potential, please don't force me to pick you because you are so inspired and inspiring. Just as you are not an actor, I am not a director. I hope that you keep trying and forgive me. Thanks.

Kimberly [userpic]

(no subject)

February 21st, 2008 (12:08 am)

Perhaps it was a lie, that this has been the greatest day of my life, but actually, I'm almost sure that this upcoming weekend will be much better. I will meet Orli, my friend's little girl, I will see my favorite band (for the small price of 400$) and Friday I will buy Dylan lunch and drink Tequiza by night.
The excitement isn't doing me any good. I still have a small paper to write about what I think a documentary is, while somehow incorporating the achievements of Robert Flaherty and the City Symphony films, plus the voice of Hemingway and the direction of Orson Welles and blah blah and then somehow also incorporating "Salesmen" and the new wave of journalistic multimedia shit, where our careers are fatally headed. So the daunting task is including all of this into two pages.
I'm so tired though! I worked a cooking class banquet called "All Fish" tonight. A queer and balding little man gutted whole fish and then cooked them and I passed it out to people who were taking notes. But get this, the red stripper fish, during its adolescence, learns to swim on its side horizontally and both its eyes migrate to one side of its head. Fancy. PS. catfish aren't Kosher no matter what way you prepare them.

Kimberly [userpic]

(no subject)

January 29th, 2008 (03:15 pm)

You must excuse my state of mind. It is not completely natural. Today is the greatest day of my life so far. It really is.

Kimberly [userpic]

(no subject)

November 4th, 2007 (11:51 pm)

I think my volleyball team set an unbelievable record this season, 18 losses, without a single match win, and more astoundingly, not a single game win. I'm glad the torture is over, and that I can start allowing my finger to heal, and now I actually have free time with which I will be doing homework and spending more time with Tim.

Hm. Tim. How did that happen? An ex? One month relationship? We broke up by ignoring each other. I guess that's a good way to sort of bookmark someone. We had unresolved issues. We didn't blow up and yell at each other, we didn't even talk. Amazingly, I had one of his old cell phones and his hoodie till August, when we had broken up last October. So...we met so I could return his stuff, essentially. Ended up getting high. Guess he really didn't have to work on that paper that night. And...we totally fell for each other. Whatever happened or didn't happen last year set us up for something really great. We've even been together for a while now. I don't know how I could allow this, I didn't think I could feel this way again. But he earned it. And I guess I earned it from him. Just the basic desire to hang out then to hold hands then to kiss then to whatever (wink wink) and then here we are, and he's my best friend, I want to buy stuff for him, I want to do 50 on Kelly Drive even if I get a ticket, I want to hang out with HIS friends, I want to call him, I want to text him, I want to be able to contact him every second of every day, I want to take road trips with him, I want to smoke his weed and unbefuckingleivable? I want to clean his apartment, buy him groceries, talk about him to my parents, save for his Christmas present and look nice and smell good and what is wrong with me?
I said never again but...here it is. It's not suffocating, I can absolutely be independent. Our finances are equal. We both have T-mobile. (What are the odds?) And I know him so well. I am not in love with him because I do not know him, and he's a mystery (typical Kim behavior) but because I KNOW HIM. The same stupid jokes, the showing off, the insecurities, the dreams, the playlists, I know the stories behind them all, Angela and Jill, and his dog and his sister and his parents and it's interesting to me and I don't look at anyone else anymore.
He's not perfect; he went to see Thursday tonight! HAH. But...but...but...I was compelled to write about it all, and I've never known anyone this supportive, this nice, this friendly. The first guy my sister ever liked. He acted for me in a goddamned short film for a commu class. That's love.

Uh, anyway, I have a lot more free time now, Leeann and Jessie I miss you and Jackie you too, you should come visit me and Colin at work on a Sunday. Hope all you guys are doing as well as I am.

Kimberly [userpic]

October? Ikea?

October 13th, 2007 (12:00 am)
content

current mood: content

What happened to the month? I'm "building" a life with someone; I've spent a consecutive week sleeping in the arms of another human being. Despite the eminent exhaustion, I am good. Still playing volleyball, also good, classes are looking good too. Missed the Architecture in Helsinki dance show because I had to watch two people who ate way too many mushrooms, but the night turned out good though, everything has been smooth. I got a new toothbrush too. On the calm, unwinding river, the smallest things tend to create happiness. :)